AAAH!

I moved.

But the reality still hasn't set in.

I feel like I'm just down the street from my mom; when my girls get to be too much, she's going to come save me.

BUT THAT IS SO NOT THE CASE ANYMORE.

I've only been gone for two days, but already I miss everyone.

I miss Maryn and all her creative brilliance. I know Abby misses her as her best friend.
I miss talking to my mom about everything, laughing about the funny things Abby said, and eating chocolate cheerio treats. Even though we forgot to make those this Christmas.
I miss my dad, his smile when he's holding a grandchild, and his goofy jokes about the Church.

I miss Sarah. Period. Why do you have to be so far away?

I miss Stephen and Ashton and their lively exuberance. Sometimes I think they are the happiest and most chill people I know.
I miss Sambo. Awesome, spunky, mischievous Sambo. We were just getting to be good friends finally when I left. Don't forget me, okay little dude?

I miss my friends in Provo. Who knew I'd actually miss that place? Megs, Kylie, Brianna, Erin... you girls are awesome. Miss your guts already.

I miss all my extended family that I've played with since I was four. You're all my favorite. I love you to death. I'll hold a baseball game on Memorial Day in your honor. ;)

I'm so grateful that I have awesome, AWESOME friends in Washington already. We pulled a girls night already. Best night of my week.

Things will be great. I just have to take this transition one step at a time.... but that doesn't even seem possible with how much is happening at once.

I'm trying not to think about it all.

But as I'm typing to you all, this is what I'm looking at:


It pretty much looks like an explosion on Inception in every room. Even though we've spent every day working on things... it doesn't seem to disappear.

And now for a random HAPPY note:

My Claire baby HATES baby food. We've been trying for weeks, but she just doesn't care for it. On Monday, Brit showed me a baby food she gives her babe called HappyBaby. Seriously, there's a reason for the name.

It's the best baby food ever!

Looks betters, smells better, and I imagine it tastes better because, holy cow, Claire downed a good 4.5 oz thing today of sweet potato, carrot, apple and cinnamon in like ten minutes. She would literally yell at me for more. I love that each pouch has a fruit and a vegetable. It's way easier to feed them. I squeeze it onto a spoon, but when she's bigger she'll be able to drink it right out of the pouch. And if she doesn't finish it all, I just screw the lid back on. No worrying about spit breaking down the food to mush.

So yes, it costs a little more, and I KNOW my family is chuckling about the "organic" label, but really, check out that happy baby! It's worth it!

Thank you for reading post #1 from Bellevue, Washington.

Love you!

Fact: It's been almost two months since I last posted.

Also a fact: We move to Washington in just over a week. Actually, Jesse leaves on Monday. I leave on the 10th with the girls.

I'm sorry I haven't posted. Life has been so stressful. I'm trying to handle it well, but it's definitely been a ride. Jesse graduated this month. The movers/packers showed up to haul away our stuff. We cleaned the house. Two days later we hopped on a plane for a week and a half in Alabama. We leave for Utah tomorrow.

And then in a week I leave for Washington.

I'm exhilarated. Exhausted. Terrified. And then somewhere after the peanut butter chocolate cheesecake we swing back to excited.

So here are some of the family pictures we did with Jesse's family during the Christmas break. Unfortunately, this was the fifth picture session for Abby in three months. Oh my. She was NOT happy. After about ten minutes of pictures, she literally broke down sobbing... so I didn't get any of just her or with her and Claire or with her anywhere. I tried. So hard. I tried to be patient, but it was awful.

Anyway.








I love my little family. I'm SO proud of Jesse for graduating and landing a stellar job. He's an incredible man and I love him so so much. He's worked incredibly hard and he rarely complains. He deserves the best. He seriously has the most pure heart in the world. Pure, caring, loving, respectful. And handsome. I know this sounds cheesy, but really he's a knight in spectacularly inked armor. Not his skin--his armor. No tattoos for skin.

Love you babe. Thanks for being the best.

P.S. Did you know my five year anniversary is coming up? I won't even spend it with Jesse. He'll be drowned in 100 boxes of our stuff in an otherwise empty house in Bellevue.... and I'll probably be eating ice cream and watching some BBC in Bountiful. Bah.

I'm excited for the New Year. 2010 was one of the most difficult years of my life. Here's to a redeeming 2011, yeah?

Loves.

A house! And Christmas pics!

We potentially found a house in Washington to rent! Huzzah!

Kind of cute, right? We obviously haven't seen it for real, but from the pictures and the location, we LOVE it. It's right around the corner from the church building we went to this past summer. It's also super close to several of our friends. We're so stoked! So hopefully it will go through in the next couple of weeks.

So our next dilemma is finding furniture to actually furnish this cute house. There's my call for help. If you have unwanted furniture, let me know. We may be able to take if off your hands. ;)

And of course I have to post cute pictures of my girls and Sambo. A couple weeks ago my mom and dad had their picture taken with the grandkids with Busath. After that session, we went to Ashton's to take a few more pictures of the kids. Awesomely cute children.

800 days of pictures.

There's not THAT many pictures. Only like.... 5. But here are the Halloween pictures I promised. Admit it. We are AWESOME.

Dr. Seuss, Sam I Am, and the Cat in the Hat.

Our lovely Belle. Grandma Larsen made the dress. Isn't it killer?!

ramblings of a stolen pumpkin

You know those wicked brilliant pumpkins we posted about last time?

They were stolen last night. Last year our bowl of candy (literally the bowl AND the candy) that we set out was stolen (we were at the ward party). And this year it was our pumpkins. So as I stated on facebook, next year I'm putting out chocolate laxatives. We'll see how they like THAT! ...except that I won't be in this house anymore....

Anyway... I had another thought.

Tonight we put our overly exhausted girls to bed and Jesse and I parted ways to do whatever it is we do at night. Jesse started working on homework, the senior film, personal projects, etc. And with my hands on my hips, I stared at my kitchen wishing the dishes would do themselves and gagging at the sight of all the cookies, treats, candy, etc. we accumulated over the past three days of Halloween celebrations. I refused to deal with any of it. So I skipped into the dark living room, picked up the laptop with a wavering determination to read scriptures and conference talks online. But first I had to check my email. And then facebook. It's just a couple places, right? Oh, and my friends' blogs. And then msnbc.com for news. And then suddenly I found myself watching Taylor Swift music videos and Will Ferrell singing Celine Dion on the Tonight Show. When did that happen? I watched Taylor's beautiful hair, listened to her sing, and desperately wished I wasn't a mom cleaning up baby toys and toddler messes. I wanted to be famous and sing like Taylor Swift and be funny and confident like Will Ferrell and ... my shining life as a mom and wife suddenly grew dimmer and dimmer and dimmer... I even stood up and announced to Jesse that I wanted to be famous. I was secretly resenting my life. I stomped to the bathroom, blew my nose, and came back to Taylor's music videos again.

Something inside me told me to turn them off.
But I wanted to watch... just one more...

It's ridiculous that I even had that battle. I hurriedly got into lds.org to watch the latest Mormon Messages video and then found my spot to start reading in Helaman. I'm starting 3 Nephi tonight! I'm totally geeking out about that. I LOVE 3 Nephi. Anyway. Back to my story. There was a total shift in my spirit as I started watching the church videos and reading my scriptures. Suddenly, the life of glamour and celebrity was ridiculous and ... I was ashamed of my previous thoughts. I felt the calming peace and assurity that I'm living the right life. I'm doing the right thing. I was shocked at the almost tangible difference from the confusing unhappiness I felt watching the music videos to the peace and happiness I felt watching and reading on lds.org. I'm not saying that watching music videos is bad. Grief, I do it all of the time. But at this instant, it was a negative influence in my life. I'm grateful for the Spirit that can help me recognize when Satan is using a seemingly harmless activity to make me confused and want to run away from what I know is true. I know he does it all of the time. He uses daily things to try to break us down. Do what you can in your life to have the spirit with you at all times. I know that it feels like a lot sometimes--scriptures with family, scriptures alone, family prayer, couple prayer, individual prayer, FHE, temple--and more. It feel like A LOT. But it invites the spirit into our lives. And that's what helps me make it through every day. The Spirit helps me recognize when Satan is attacking. I need the strength of the Spirit to help me survive.

I went to the temple this week. Ahh.... it's the only place I can breathe for two hours without anxiety and outside concerns....

I love the temple.

So like I said, it feels like a lot, but it's worth it. And really, what else are we spending our time doing? Blogging, emails, people.com, facebook, staring at the wall....
I love the way the Spirit feels in our home. I love the genuine happiness it brings to my heart. Keep it with you so you can recognize those promptings too.

Next time I'll post Halloween pictures, I promise. :) Love you!